Question:
Why I am no longer a Christian.
I was brought up by two Christian parents, went to a Christian elementary school, and went to church regularly till I was about 13 or so. The reason that I stopped going to church was because my sister and I were pretty much forced out, as in people stopped talking to us. My parents were divorcing and my mother had a drinking problem. So instead of embracing us they shunned us. My parents had stopped attending service but still dropped us off and picked us up every Sunday and Wednesday. But instead of embracing two kids that were having a hard time they pushed us out. Now before any one says that was an isolated situation with a bad church let me tell you it happened twice and two separate churches. That turned me away from church but not God or Jesus, but that was the start. I did from time to time try to get back into church but all I found was one church, a very large on in Amarillo TX that bordered on cult, and one that focused on money and the end times. True that the end times need to be taught but there is a difference between teaching and trying to scar people into faith. All things combined turned me away from church but not God or Jesus that came later.
As I grew up, broke away from my parent’s influence. (As all children do as they grow older) and really started observing the world and forming my own ideas I started to find more and more reasons to brake away from the Christian beliefs. I have a lot of respect for religious people and there beliefs and make a point to never put them or there beliefs down or try to convince the they are wrong. (More then I can say for some not all but some Christians) I find all religions interesting and love a good philosophical discussions. I like to learn about different religions and there history. I also feel all religions are valid and have lots of good things to offer. I have attended Methodist, and Baptist, services as well as catholic mass, and Wiccan circles. Every time I was respectful and learned something.
I have a very different view on religion then most people. Maybe some time I will tell more about what I believe and my ideas on how I think the universe works. But for now I will sum it up by saying I believe its is more important to have faith then what you have faith in. It is in my opinion better to have ideas then beliefs, ideas can change were as beliefs are rigged, something wars have been fought over.
Back to what I was saying. As I began to form new ideas and did some research I found more and more reasons to shed the faith in God and Jesus. The reasons for this are many and complex but I find more and more things to make feel that I was right to do so every day. A lot of these reasons come from observing Christians them selves. I just cant get my mind to bend around the idea that God spoke to only one group of people and that that group is the only right way. The people that say God speaks only to me and those that think and believe just like me, we are right and every one else is going to hell makes it all seem so limiting. I think God would have to be so much bigger then that. Why would he give man free choice only to tell them you have to chouse this. I know a woman and she is truly a good person. I mean truly, never gossips about people, similes threw the worst of times bend over backwards to help someone in need excellent whiteness to her faith, but she is Jewish. If she is going to hell the so will I and I will wear a sweatshirt for spite.
In addition to this I would like to give a few examples of the experiences I have had with Christian believers. Wear I work we are open for almost all holidays but with only a very limited staff. People are asked to volunteer to work and typically there is no problem. But this Easter they were short on volunteers, most of the people I work with are Christian, and those that are not did not want to work it because it was nonpayed holiday. So it was getting down to the point were the boss was going to have to assign people to work. She made one more announcement asking for volunteers. I decided to speak up and say I would work even though I had plans. I stated I would work it since it was not what I considered a religious holiday. Tying to be nice and let those that did enjoy their Easter. At witch point on woman a very devote believer asked me “ what do you mean its not a religious holiday for you?” I told that basically did not believe in Jesus or the Easter bunny. She responded and I quote “ girl you better take two steps back from me, so that when lightning strikes you it wont get me too” meaning I think you are going to hell. I held my tong knowing that work is not a good place to discuss ones beliefs but a BIG part of me wanted to say, “save me a seat”
Over the last few years other have come along furthering my faith that I was right to turn away from the Christian faith, mainly the “I am right every one else is going to hell type” a good example of this would be IRR. That’s right IRR you do not further you cause you give me further reason to turn away. I am not saying that all Christians are bad or bad examples I have meet may that were good examples. I have the utmost resect for all faiths (excluding only extremist that aim to further their cause by violence)
This has become to long already, so I will stop here for now. I just thought that some might want to know what turns people away, at least what turned me away.
Buttrfly

Answer:

Thanks for sharing with us amber.
And welcome aboard.
Don't be a stranger.
Pecos out-

Answer:

Thank you Pecos!
Buttrfly

Answer:

Amber,
My journey down the path to understanding and tolerance began very simular to yours. I saw so much anger and intolerance I had to find something else. I was raised in the Church of God and attended a Southern Baptist church in my teen years. I saw affairs going on, drug and alcohol use, child abuse and many other 'sins" but because I attended without my parents I was the one who did not fit in. When I became the victim of a violent crime I was blamed for it. I must have sinned and that was my payment. EXCUSE ME!? I walked away from the church at that point.. but not God. I left my belief in God later.
I do not denounce the beliefs of others as long as the proclaimed belief is not use to harm others in any way...including verbally. Verbal violence is just as bad and evil, if not worse, than physical violence. ()
Yes I ask lots of questions of other beliefs but for the most part it's to understand why people chose to believe as they do. throughunderstanding we grow and become less fearful and therefore less intolerant. It also gives us the chance to share a message that is more likely to be heard. Those who look upon questions as attacks generally are insecure in thier beliefs in my humble opinion.
Faiths and religions forefill a need in people. A need to belong socially. So if your faith gives you strength, hope, peace and love and the ability to share those things in how you live you life then it's good. If your faith makes you feel the need to demean others who make you question yourself and to attack all who are different instead of sharing good in how you live and treat others... then it's bad. So simple yet so hard for some to understand.
Peace to you and yours...
**The fact that I have no remedy for all the sorrows of the world is no reason for my accepting yours. It simply supports the strong probability that yours is a fake. Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956)**

Answer:

Once again I fell the need to say something and only hope that I can convey my thoughts without being mis-understood.
Among the things that kept me from becoming any sort of practicing Christian are the very things you bring up. With all the evil happenings going on in this world, the saddest thing to me is that many of these acts are being done by self proclaimed Christians.
I will not attempt any sort of statistics on the number of Christians that really are not, but we certainly know there are a lot of them. I also offer no excuses for them.
Yes, I am a practicing Christian now. I have been involved in many different denominations. Everyone of them had these people as members. In some, even the leaders were doing acts of evil and living hypocritical lives.
Several times each week we can turn on the news and find these people in the headlines. I shudder every time I hear about the priest, the minister, the Sunday School teacher, the active member of the community who goes to church every Sunday, and then see the victems who suffered at thier hands. These stories rip my heart out. They are enough for me to cry out to God as to why he would allow such things to happen.
Compared to some, my faith is strong. I remain where I am as God wishes me to. Those who's faith is weaker, or just beggining to awaken, see these things and are driven away.
I do not claim to have all the answers. When it comes to education of the faith, I am just an infant. But I do know that God does not allow these things. We do. One of the greatest gifts God has given us is free will. We commit these sins then complain that God allowed it to happen. This is just another way we push off responsibility to someone else.
This should be easy for someone who does not believe in God to understand. If there is no God, then it is just us. If there is only us, then it is us who must claim all responsibility for all evil in the world. God could certainly not allow such things to happen if He did not exist.
Can you imagine what we would be like if we did not have free will? We would actually be the mind numbed robots that Christians are so often accused of being. I give my will freely to God, by my choice. I have to look past all the hypocrasy to keep my faith. It gets harder and harder when I see even those I looked to and respected have become complete hypocrites themselves.
Lets face it. Sin is actually much more exciting and lucrative than being good.It can also be very deceptive and can draw one in so quickly that we do not always realize what we have done. Then we find ourselves rationalizing what we did to ease our guilt.
As God has pointed out to me, hypocrasy is everywhere. Sin is everywhere. We are all sinners. We are human and cannot avoid every occasion of sin. We must seek salvation, (which is why God, in His infinate mercy sent His Son to us.)
But truly, I really can understand why some turn away. I do understand why so many do not like Christians. I do understand why when so many good people have been so terribly scarred by so called Christians. Anyone can call themselves Christians. Anyone can become some sort of minister. It's easy. In 1977 gave the State of Fl. $25.00 and became a minister. I am not now nor have I ever been a real minister. I just tried to play one. I was wrong.
Only by the Word can one really be a Christian. look to what they actually say, (listen to the meaning as opposed to what you wish to hear,) and thier deeds. One cannot speak and do evil and still be a Christian. These good Christians, unfortunatly, are in the minority. You will seldom find them in the headlines.
May God's peace be with you and as always, God Bless.
--"So long, and thanks for all the fish."--

Answer:

put me right up there on the list some of you might call "know it all pushy Christians," but here goes..
I do not say this to be demeaning or anything like that..
These stories sound much like some experiences I have had with Christians and I also walked away for a time, but what I found out is the problem was with me not them... IF you have truly asked Christ into your heart you can NOT walk away from The Lord for good.
Somewhere, sometime somehow there will be a feeling, urge, whatever you want to call it, that you must try again.
I may not be saying that just right
I believe too many people who say they have given up on the Christian faith may have had their eyes on people and not God. (that was my problem)
NO Church is perfect and No Christian is perfect, But God is. You must keep focused on HIM not other Christians. They are struggling each day just as you are.
Many say there is no proof God is real, I believe He is, I have seen what He can do in the life of a person who is willing to yield everything to Him,
I see that as one of the reasons some people will not accept HIM..Because of selfishness.
I want, I need, me, me ,me... They are afraid they will have to give up something they want, for what HE wants for them.
I have been on both sides and am not trying to condemn anyone,
Some Christians may get pushy about sharing their faith, I can only say in my case if I do it is because I know how HE has changed my life and just want others to know HE can do the same for them. It is not all about saying I am right and you are wrong, it is like having a really great gift and instead of keeping it all to yourself you want everyone to have some of it.
Sorry I got carried away

Answer:

Thank you to all that took the time to read and respond to this rather long post. I feel that all the post have so far been on the positive side.
Let me take a minute to add some detail on a few points. The experiences I had with those churches is what started me on the path of searching for something else. What really got me going was opening my mind to other possibilities and observation of how the world works. I still believe that the bible makes some good points and I think all faiths have something to offer. This is an over simplification but the best way to describe of I think and feel about religion it that any one that worships a god/gods no matter how different the faiths may seem are in fact worshiping the same thing. Putting a name to a god or organizing a church is not the important thing. Finding something that gives you fulfillment, helps you make sense of the world, gives hope and meaning to your life, and gets you to strive toward personal growth and improvement that’s what is important. As I see it religions though very different tend to have that in common.
Buttrfly

Answer:

Finding something that gives you fulfillment, helps you make sense of the world, gives hope and meaning to your life, and gets you to strive toward personal growth and improvement that’s what is important.
Until I found God in my life, and accepted jesus as my savior, I never placed any real value in my life. I was very wreckless, on the edge all the time. I was a stoned, drunken slob with no regard for anyone or anything. I would just as soon spit in your eye as look at you. I had no more respect for anyone than I did for myself.
Comes along a Wickan. She shed some real light on my life. I still do not really understand what she was all about, but, even though I could not follow what she was trying to show me, she did open my eyes to something I had lost.
Once you open your heart to the Spirit and give Him someplace to start, He continues to grow withen you, and even as I was fighting Him, I liked what I was seeing and allowed Him to open my eyes to what God is all about.
I believe that I could not understand what that girl was trying to show me because this is not what God wanted me to follow.
Ma, I understand completely with what you are saying and agree. It's the times I take my eyes off God that I screw up. This is why I must be so adamant about my faith.
God Bless you all.
--"So long, and thanks for all the fish."--